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Aug 15 2016

3 Reasons We Have to Learn to Say No

sandra

I’ll admit that there was a time when saying no was a problem for me. As a chronic people pleaser, I was always saying yes to things I should have been saying no to. It led to overwhelm, frustration and often times, resentment. This is why I feel pretty confident in sharing these three reasons why we have to learn to say no.

  1. You risk becoming a bitter b-tch

When we don’t have boundaries, there are always going to be people who take advantage of the situation. If you don’t want to feel like you’re constantly being treated like a doormat, you’re going to have to put on your big girl panties and start saying no. Sure it will feel uncomfortable at first, but if you don’t learn how to say no soon, you’re going to end up bitter and resentful. When it gets to this point you run the risk of saying no to things you should actually be saying yes to.

  1. There’s always someone else who will say yes

Many times we choose to say yes because we worry that if we don’t the person asking will be left stranded. Whether we want to admit it or not, we’re playing the martyr in a situation like this. We feel like we have to sacrifice our time and do what’s asked of us because if we don’t the world will come to a complete standstill. I hate to be the one to break it to you, but as wonderfully special as you are, you cannot possibly be the only go-to person for every favour request. Believe me when I say that even if you say no, it will get done – eventually 🙂

  1. You’ve got your own empire to build!

I’m sure you have your own list of things to accomplish, goals you want to achieve, dreams you want to make a reality. If you spend all your time taking care of everyone else’s needs, when do you find the time to get the things that are important to you done? You’ve got to find a way to balance it all. If you haven’t reviewed your priorities lately, then there’s no time like the present! If we don’t identify what’s important to us, then we don’t know where we should be focusing our time and energy. When we lack focus, it’s so much easier to get pulled in many different directions, none of them serving our needs in any way.

It’s okay to say no sometimes. Know that NO can actually be a full and complete sentence. You don’t have to give an explanation or justify it. If you feel you need to, go ahead. I’ll give you this warning though – no matter what the explanation is; there will be those that don’t want to hear it. Especially those who are used to you saying yes all the time. Some will even consider this change in behaviour a bit selfish. The good news is that most will respect you for it in the long run and your relationships will benefit as well. Like TD Jakes says, “greatness is contagious”. You might as well focus on your greatness so that you can lift those around you to the same level. If you don’t have the time to focus on you, how will you ever become the rising tide that lifts all boats?

Sandra Dawes is a certified life coach specializing in helping women who feel unfulfilled with their 9-5 follow their dreams and pursue their passions. She holds an Honours BA, an MBA as well as a certificate in Dispute Resolution. She has completed her first book,Embrace Your Destiny: 12 Steps to Living the Life You Deserve!

Connect:

www.embraceyourdestiny.ca

www.facebook.com/embraceyourdestiny

www.facebook.com/embraceyourdestinythebook

www.twitter.com/sandradawes

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Written by Dwania Peele · Categorized: Sandra Dawes · Tagged: boundaries, build your empire, Business Woman, Canadian Small Business Women, Dreams, entrepreneur, no, people pleaser, Sandra Dawes, Say No, say yes, TD Jakes

Feb 19 2014

Mind Your Own Business. The Best Advice You Will Ever Get.

Rose

I know, it sounds a little rude and at times somewhat arrogant.  I’m sure you’ve had it said to you or overheard it in conversations in earshot. “Mind your own business” If you’re like me, you probably responded or thought, “Excuse me?” The statement has a sting to it that truly takes a bite at your ego and may cause you to act negatively towards the person delivering it.

But if you take a step back, and remove it from the personal arena,” Mind your Own Business” is one of the most valuable piece of advice you will ever receive, especially in business.  If you think about it, you are in business, your business.  Shouldn’t you be minding it?  Putting all your focus and energy into it?

It’s actually a positive rather than a negative. Too often, small business owners like you and I are so caught up looking into the competition that we lose sight of our own.  It’s one thing to research to understand your competition.  I mean, you have to know what they are doing in order to formulate your strategies to corner your place in the market, but you have to avoid getting blindsided.  Nothing requires more attention than your business.   To ensure you put this advice to good use follow these simple rules:

  1. Be Organized—is essential to everything.  Put things in perspective. Keep things in order. Know who the players are. Know where you need to be.  Keep a master TO DO list. Delegate. Designate.
  2. Keep Focused—your business is your focus.  Everything you do and say and breath is your business.  Don’t allow distractions (especially negative ones) at home, in business, or at play.
  3. Stick to the Plan—go to your business plan often, as a reminder, as a check-point, as a gauge.  Pinpoint where you are at and where you a going.  Update regularly as business develops.
  4. Follow Up—with leads, opportunities, people, places and things.
  5. Network Outside your Industry—so important.  Some of your best contact and creative ideas may very well be just outside your industry.  Take your observations and knowledge and bring it back to your business to see how you can enhance and improve.
  6. Learn to say NO—don’t be a “yes-preneur”. Being able to say NO allows you to weed out people, place and things that may lead you away from your business.
  7. Remember Why—Remember why you started your business. Your vision. Your mission. Your goals. Your Life.
  8. Ask for help—you cannot do this alone because entrepreneurship can be lonely.  Gather the troops and ask for their help and support.
  9. Grow with It—your business is not what it was the day you started it. As your business grows you have to grow with it.  Learn what works and what doesn’t and understand why.
  10. Go with your Gut—it rarely fails. It’s usually right. It keeps you accountable and responsible. Your head and your heart can often lie, but your gut never lies.

The next time someone tells you  to “Mind your own business”, simply reply “Thanks, I think I will”.

 

Rose Nixon, is Your “Anything” Organizer, Chief Professional Organizer and Principal Owner of ReallyOrganizedNow(RON), A Professional organizing company that brings Mindful Solutions for Stress-Less Living.  Rose knows that Life can be stressful enough without having the added burden of Disorganization.  Rose also knows that when you’re Organized you Smile more.  You are more pleasant to be around.  You enjoy people, places and things with greater ease, comfort and focus.  Rose helps active women and families find solutions and support to Stress-Less and Live More. She helps them BE ReallyOrganizedNow. Are you ReallyOrganizeNow? 

Contact Rose on social media

https://www.facebook.com/reallyorganizednow

https://twitter.com/roseKNOWSron

http://www.youtube.com/user/ReallyOrganizedNow/videos 

http://about.me/reallyorganizednow

 

 

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Written by Dwania Peele · Categorized: Rose Nixon · Tagged: Be Organized, business, Business Woman, Canadian Small Business Women, entrepreneur, Focused, follow up, Mind Your Own Business, perspective, positive, Really Organized Now, Remember, RON, Rose Nixon, Say No, small business, small business owners

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