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Oct 13 2017

Tongue Tied About Public Speaking? You’re Not Alone …

“According to most studies, people’s number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death is number two. Does that sound right? This means to the average person, if you go to a funeral, you’re better off in the casket than doing the eulogy” – Jerry Seinfeld

Public Speaking with Microphone

With the Right Preparation, You Can Become a Better Public Speaker

The phone rings, I pick up to hear the familiar and confident voice of a friendly business acquaintance, let’s just call her Liz. We talk briefly about upcoming projects, discuss current events, and then what she says next absolutely floors me! Liz, who is one of the most talented public speakers I know, has terrible stage fright. This is a woman who is articulate, poised, and has a great sense of humor that effortlessly engages her audience, and yet, she revealed how thoroughly she must prepare herself for the task of commanding a room with confidence. Curious as I was amazed, I asked Liz how does she does do it? How does she make it look so easy, and what’s more, continually overcome this fear?

“It usually takes me more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech” – Mark Twain

With a humble chuckle, Liz explains that she has a strict method that gives her some comfort and predictability.  Very early in the morning, she is either practicing a speech, pitch, or presentation for an upcoming client or company who she will meet that day. For shorter pitches, Liz does this about 10 – 15 times before leaving the house and continues this process of rehearsing as she drives to the intended meeting. Sure, her hands shake, and she usually opts out of having a cup coffee if someone will see it shaking. She’ll usually skip her second coffee due to a nervous stomach, but every week she defies those persistent anxieties.

“You may not be interested in strategy, but strategy is interested in you.”– Leon Trotsky

The credibility and extensive network that Liz has built in, part because of her effective public speaking, led me to believe that hers was a natural talent that very few possess. However, her candid admission made me realize that a large part of her success is due to her work effort and strategy. It’s quite possible that other great speakers have certain rituals or tactics to lessen their feelings of intimidation in front of an audience. For instance, Liz found a creative approach by removing her eyeglasses. She says this makes her less nervous. It helps blur the numerous faces staring at her so that she doesn’t get caught up in their expressions and can focus on the content, rather than the actual room.

So, what are some of Liz’s behind the scenes tricks you can use to prepare for your next presentation, speech, or big meeting?

  1. Accept that you have stage fright, but boldly confront it anyway
  2. Practice and prepare in advance (time management is key). Consider recording yourself in an audio or even a video format.
  3. Use resourceful ways to ease your fright. If you have glasses, perhaps taking them off may ease the intense glare of eyes on you. You may want to find an outfit (albeit professional) that is comfortable. This includes footwear. It’s amazing how the wrong clothing can distract you, or make you uncomfortably warm, itchy, or feel constraining when under pressure

    Woman Speaking in Public

  4. Use your surroundings; map out where you will be speaking from. Pick a seat that you can easily get up from to head to the podium. You may want to try walking while talking if the stage permits movement, this will give you time to find a spot to pause and deliberate if there are questions.
  5. Plan your pauses, take deep breaths, and never rush through your speech.
  6. Try breathing exercises and or meditation techniques starting days before the public speaking to help you relax.

If these tips have been helpful, but you still feel your fear of meetings, job interviews, speeches, or any other public situations are still excessively bothersome please contact me. Together, we can customize a personal strategy to make you a more effective speaker (or meeting chairperson or interviewee) and help you to develop the necessary skills.

If you have HR or career-related matters that you’d like to discuss, please contact me by email, phone, or via direct message on Twitter, Facebook, or LinkedIn. I’m also available if you’d like to discuss any of these topics in more detail.

More than career coaching, it’s career psychology®.

I/O Advisory Services – Building Resilient Careers.

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Written by Dwania Peele · Categorized: Dr. Helen Ofosu · Tagged: conquer your fear, fear, presentation, public speaking, speech, strategy, tongue tied

Apr 29 2015

The Biggest Mistake Made When Networking!

 yvonne

A few months ago I attended a networking event where someone walked up to me, and the first thing they did was give me a business card, spoke barely a few words and walked away, and I noticed they did the same with others, distributing their business card. I was at another networking and business event, where someone brings out a BIG bundle of business cards to give me one, and this left me speechless, but with a strong desire to revisit the art of networking.

Considering the amount of information out there on effective networking, one could be forgiven for assuming the art of networking would be common knowledge. The biggest mistake that unfortunately is still happening is when people see networking as an opportunity to ‘sell’, ‘promote’ or ‘get’ as much possible to their benefit.

Networking can be described as the process of interacting or engaging in communication with others for mutual assistance or support. Note the word ‘mutual’? When networking is done properly, its benefits can be endless, and includes making business contacts, establishing new friendships or relationships, or seeking advice and information.

Networking is not a race to distribute as many business cards or get as many cards as possible. Yes networking is effective for building your professional career or business, and I can testify to having great results from networking, but this happened when I was being present in the moment, being authentic, and interested in the other person.

From my own experience, trainings attended and reading done, one key point that cannot be overemphasised is that ‘Networking is about building Relationships’. Only in getting to know someone and vice versa can a need be met effectively. We need to change our mindset from focusing on not just what we can get, but to also what we can give. The law of nature and reciprocity has proven that in giving we are bound to receive.

 How to Network Effectively

  1. Prepare beforehand by having a positive attitude and think of what you would like to achieve from attending i.e. meet two new people today. However, keep an open mind at the event, which could open you to receiving more than you expected.
  2. Have your elevator pitch/speech ready on how to introduce yourself effectively; short, to the point and effective.
  3. If you feel lost, nervous or struggle to join a group that is already in conversation, find someone on their own and introduce yourself.
  4. Develop the art of small talk; start a topic in relation to the event you are presently at, a related current affairs topic or admire something about the person you want to start the conversation with. Some simple conversation starters include ‘great event…’, ‘Is this your first time here…’
  5. Listen and focus your attention on who you are talking with, imagine how you would feel if you were talking with someone and they are constantly looking around or at their cell phone.
  6. Use open-ended questions that will help keep the conversation flowing, as opposed to closed-ended questions that solicit a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answer.
  7. When you receive a business card. Write a note on it to help jog your memory for the next time you look at the card.
  8. Make sure you follow up after events; it could be call to say hello or how well you enjoyed meeting them. This helps to create a connection that you can work towards building.
  9. Networking does not start and end with formal events, you can also network effectively at social events and online on social media.

We are constantly faced with opportunities to network in the many facets of our lives, and what you do with your opportunity has the capability to positively and significantly impact your life or not.

Share some of your networking stories or tips with us below. What do you think of Networking?

To learn about Yvonne’s latest book on Changing your Mindset for greater results, visit http://www.oliveblue.com/changeyourmindset/

Yvonne is an Author, Speaker, Change Consultant & John Maxwell Leadership Coach who is passionate about working with Individuals, Entrepreneurs and Organisations to help implement change they want and achieve their goals.   

She can be reached at: www.oliveblue.com . www.facebook.com/oliveblueinc . www.twitter.com/oliveblueinc.www.youtube.com/ChangeYouWantTV

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Written by Dwania Peele · Categorized: Yvonne Ruke Akpoveta · Tagged: business, business card, Canadian Small Business Women, coach, connection, Elevator Pitch, engaging, entrepreneur, Events, focus, follow up, interacting, introduction, John Maxwell, listen, networking, OliveBlue Inc, online marketing, professional, promote, Reciprocity, Relationships, self promote, small talk, social media, Speaker, speech, Yvonne Ruke Akpoveta

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